Column | Sugared eggs and unwanted guests

For most of my life, I have seen Phuphee mark the end of the year with the simplest of celebrations. Years ago, I asked her if it even counted as a celebration if it was just her, to which she replied, ‘It is a celebration as long as you believe it is, because sometimes you can be at a celebration and yet others might be just pretending to.’ I was a little taken aback by this as I felt it was full of cynicism, which was unusual for Phuphee. By the time I was done, I felt mostly like myself but a tiny sliver of the frost remained, staying inaccessible to the warmth that always came with Phuphee’s food. That is validation enough.’ She took my face in her soft hands and asked, ‘Do you know what the worst thing about seeking validation is? I pulled them more snugly around my feet, feeling the last bit of frost melt in the gentle, warm sunlight that Phuphee’s presence, her words and her cooking brought into my life.