‘Girl code’ is toxic and infantilising – there’s no place for it in 2023

Stay ahead of the curve with our weekly guide to the latest trends, fashion, relationships and more Stay ahead of the curve with our weekly guide to the latest trends, fashion, relationships and more Stay ahead of the curve with our weekly guide to the latest trends, fashion, relationships and more SIGN UP I would like to be emailed about offers, events and updates from The Independent. Like its “girl” counterparts, the phrase “girl code” carries derogatory connotations and is another example of how modern society is obsessed with reducing grown women to girls, removing their power and autonomy. But because of “girl code”, our attention isn’t on him but what the women – sorry. “For me ‘girl code’ means being sympathetic with my fellow women and putting them first, as I would put myself,” says one 27-year-old woman. “Because we’re already fighting against so much, we should be more supportive of each other.” As for what constitutes a “breach” of girl code, life coach Vicki Bahra, 30, tells me: “For me it’s anything that brings another woman down, whether it be bad mouthing, not supporting their business, stealing ideas or having bad intentions.” Of course, women shouldn’t go after their friends’ exes, or do any of the other aforementioned things that could be considered a girl code violation.