I Can’t Go Down On My Girlfriend. I Have a Good Reason. I Swear!

How to Do It is Slate’s sex advice column. I am in the process of accessing therapy for this and other adverse experiences, but it’s not sex therapy and I would like to be able to work on this in the meantime. It might take you some time to get to a place where you’re comfortable offering or engaging in giving your girlfriend oral sex. —Either, Or Dear Either, Given the conditions the two of you met under, it’s possible that this guy thought you were only interested in hooking up, and that you yourself didn’t want anything serious. This guy, or anyone else you might want to develop a relationship with, absolutely might see you as purely a hookup or friend, but that doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you, or that you won’t eventually find someone who sees you in both capacities.