6 Red Flag Phrases Narcissists Use To Manipulate You During An Argument

FG Trade via Getty Images People with narcissistic personality disorder often try to portray themselves as the victim in a conflict even when they're completely wrong. This can sound like phrases such as “you’re overreacting” or “you’re too sensitive,” which can be used to control the narrative, said Cwynar, and make you feel like you’re the one causing a problem. “I’m not angry, you’re angry.” “People with pathological narcissism or NPD use an unconscious defense mechanism called projection in which they disown their own emotions and believe they belong to someone else,” Grosso said. So, you may hear someone with narcissistic personality disorder say, “You should have known I was angry,” fully expecting you to anticipate their emotions and understand what they’re feeling without any kind of communication. “A good therapist will help you recognize, ‘Wow, it sounds like you’re really struggling, you’re trying everything you can — maybe it’s not you,’” Riaz said.