My Sadistic Dad Abused Me And Cut Me Out Of His Will. I Was Shocked By Why I Forgave Him.
Huff PostThe author with her father at her college graduation. Courtesy of Tracy Strauss When I was a child, I begged for a dog, but my father said we couldn’t have one because he was allergic. “It’s my dog.” In that moment, the seed of forgiveness took, though I wouldn’t know it until months later when I came to see that Beau’s trauma, and the aftermath, had triggered my history with my father, and with it, all of my unresolved feelings: shock, anger, betrayal, the loss of safety in a place where safety was promised, the terrifying lack of control over what happened to my body, the question of whether I’d live or die — above all, the grief that the good father I’d wanted and needed was forever gone and the bond between us destroyed. Courtesy of Tracy Strauss Even before Beau’s assault, my connection to my father reverberated in my dog’s simple presence ― his panting, his barking, his clumsy way of playing. Forgiveness was my letting go of the pain of my father’s actions and my attachment to the good father I wanted and needed, a construct long dead.
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My Father Cut Me Out Of His Will. He Meant To Hurt Me — Instead, It Was A Gift.
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