Dear Prudence: My neighbor likes to cross-dress. How do I interact with him?
9 years, 11 months ago

Dear Prudence: My neighbor likes to cross-dress. How do I interact with him?

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is online weekly to chat live with readers. My husband wants to reconcile, so he doesn’t say as much, but I know he thinks I’m responsible for the married woman’s beating. I told them politely that I plan on spending Mother’s Day with my own mom but I will pop by and say hi when they get home that evening. Surely you have caller ID, so when you see who’s on the other line, you say, “Honey, this call’s for you.” It’s great your husband is on your side, and he needs to say to his family, “Laura is spending the day with her mother. It seems clear the letter writer thought the wife was trying to keep her from spilling the beans to the husband, not that she thought, “Ha, I’m going to get this cheater beaten up!” But what she did was reckless, and even if the husband in question was not violent, the letter writer shouldn’t have told him.

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History of this topic

Dear Prudence: My job is turning me into a conservative.
5 years, 6 months ago

Dear Prudence: My job is turning me into a conservative.

Slate  

Dear Prudence, I work for the state government in the department that involves public assistance. Would you say, “Sorry, you’ll have to tough it out and throw up discreetly before you get back to your desk, and save your panic attacks for when you’re off the clock”? Dear Prudence, My mother says terrible things to me about my dad like …

Dear Prudence: My stepdad says he never wanted me.
8 years, 5 months ago

Dear Prudence: My stepdad says he never wanted me.

Slate  

Mallory Ortberg, aka Dear Prudence, is online weekly to chat live with readers. Q. Not-so-loving family: My husband’s parents live in the same state a few hours away, and we usually only see each other on holidays. You and your husband might want to spend the holidays with your side of the family, or with your own family, in your …

Dear Prudence: Emily Yoffe answers questions for Slate Plus members.
9 years, 5 months ago

Dear Prudence: Emily Yoffe answers questions for Slate Plus members.

Slate  

Every week, Emily Yoffe answers questions from readers in a live chat. Mother With Jealousy Issues: My husband and I have consistently made choices to live away from family, not to avoid them but because opportunities for school and work have taken us away. When we first moved seven years ago for grad school my parents were appalled and stated, …

Dear Prudence: I married my stepbrother.
9 years, 7 months ago

Dear Prudence: I married my stepbrother.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is online weekly to chat live with readers. Your son surely will never have a consistent, supportive relationship with his father, and that’s something he needs to be able to talk about and come to terms with. Your son needs to have qualified people around who can help him navigate this situation and who can …

Dear Prudence: My best friend is a rich, spoiled millennial.
9 years, 7 months ago

Dear Prudence: My best friend is a rich, spoiled millennial.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is online weekly to chat live with readers. Q. Green-Eyed Millennial: One of my best friends, “Nicole,” is from an extremely wealthy family, while my parents are lower-middle-class and have given me very little financial support since I started college. Nicole has been one of my closest friends for years, and when her wealth and …

Dear Prudence: My brother is the office janitor.
9 years, 11 months ago

Dear Prudence: My brother is the office janitor.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is online weekly to chat live with readers. This was never an issue until the senior manager of another unit said “Yes, I’ve heard of you, you’re the janitor’s sister” when I introduced myself. It’s not said with explicit malice, but it makes me uncomfortable and several colleagues have urged me to distance myself from …

Dear Prudence: Fat-shaming grandma is on her deathbed.
10 years, 2 months ago

Dear Prudence: Fat-shaming grandma is on her deathbed.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is online weekly to chat live with readers. My mother will not promise to hold her tongue about my DIL’s “horrid fat.” In desperation, I at one point offered to pay for a personal trainer or even gastric bypass, but that only led to a huge argument with my son. A: The memories aren’t going …

Dear Prudence: I missed out on everything by having a kid.
11 years, 6 months ago

Dear Prudence: I missed out on everything by having a kid.

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? —Sick of the Bachelor Dear Sick, As was said of one character on King of the Hill, “He’s going to make some woman very happy. More Dear Prudence Chat Transcripts “Backup Plan: In a live chat, Prudie advises a woman who just found out her …

Dear Prudence: My in-laws want to exclude my father, a burn survivor, from the wedding.
11 years, 7 months ago

Dear Prudence: My in-laws want to exclude my father, a burn survivor, from the wedding.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat live with readers. A: Your fiancé is not so amazing if in response to his mother’s outrageous, sickening request he didn’t immediately say to her, “Mom, Elise’s dad is a great person. Some of these friends have done a great job “staying in touch,” e.g., we still hang out …

Dear Prudence: The blog commenter of my nightmares is my mother.
11 years, 8 months ago

Dear Prudence: The blog commenter of my nightmares is my mother.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat live with readers. Dear Prudence: Creepy Crawly Guest Room Q. Sister’s Untreated Postpartum Depression: I visited my sister for the first time since she gave birth in April. 1 defender in the comments who goes by ‘Mindy’s Mom’ because, well, she’s my mom.” The post could say mom’s comments …

Dear Prudence: Teachers who get involved with young female students? That’s my ex.
11 years, 8 months ago

Dear Prudence: Teachers who get involved with young female students? That’s my ex.

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? More Dear Prudence Chat Transcripts “The Wrong Touch: In a live chat, Dear Prudence offers advice on a frisky roommate, felonious family members, and friends who become lovers.” Posted April 2, 2012. “Whoa, Momma: During a live chat, Dear Prudence offers advice on having children …

Dear Prudence: Possible my friend is stalking my baby?
11 years, 8 months ago

Dear Prudence: Possible my friend is stalking my baby?

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat live with readers. Hey, let’s go hiking!” Maybe he’s already “hiking the Appalachian Trail” and he just doesn’t have the guts to tell you there’s someone else. I feel like my time is running out but at this point I won’t get to spend years getting to know someone. …

Dear Prudence: Wedding problems for wedding season: who pays, who goes, and who goes too far.
11 years, 9 months ago

Dear Prudence: Wedding problems for wedding season: who pays, who goes, and who goes too far.

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? More Dear Prudence Chat Transcripts “The Wrong Touch: In a live chat, Dear Prudence offers advice on a frisky roommate, felonious family members, and friends who become lovers.” Posted April 2, 2012. “Whoa, Momma: During a live chat, Dear Prudence offers advice on having children …

Dear Prudence: I’m too pretty for my fiance.
11 years, 9 months ago

Dear Prudence: I’m too pretty for my fiance.

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? As for those who go on to probe, you can reply, “It was a very painful time, so I’m sure you can understand I’d rather not talk about it.” —Prudie Dear Prudence, I am a female graduating from college with an odd and difficult situation. …

Dear Prudence: I’d like to give my deceased wife’s vibrator to my new girlfriend.
12 years ago

Dear Prudence: I’d like to give my deceased wife’s vibrator to my new girlfriend.

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? —Too Good to Go, Too Bad to Stay Dear Bad, On your way to the fertility clinic to mix up your gametes in the laboratory because your physically capable husband is so phobic and twisted about sex that he won’t do the deed with you, …

Dear Prudence: My tiny member is hurting my love life.
12 years ago

Dear Prudence: My tiny member is hurting my love life.

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? Dear Prudence, I’m a single guy in my late 20s with a steady job and lots of good boyfriend qualities. More Dear Prudence Columns “A Marriage Hits a Rough Patch: Hubby’s new beard rubs me the wrong way, but he refuses to shave!” Posted Dec. …

Dear Prudence: I just had the most offensive Thanksgiving dinner ever.
12 years, 3 months ago

Dear Prudence: I just had the most offensive Thanksgiving dinner ever.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat live with readers. Q. Boyfriend’s Family: My boyfriend warned me ahead of time that his family was a handful, but nothing could of prepared me for Thanksgiving. He’s a great, decent guy, but his family is not one I would want to be a part of, and I’m having …

Dear Prudence: Am I too good-looking for my girlfriend?
12 years, 4 months ago

Dear Prudence: Am I too good-looking for my girlfriend?

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? More Dear Prudence Columns “My Twin Sister Says I’m Fat: Prudie offers advice on twins entangled in family rifts, rows, and rivalries.” Posted Aug. 25, 2011. “The Nudist Next Door: Dear Prudence advises a reader whose new neighbor needs better curtains—during a live chat at …

Dear Prudence: I’m married to another woman. Do I have to explain my pregnancy?
12 years, 5 months ago

Dear Prudence: I’m married to another woman. Do I have to explain my pregnancy?

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? More Dear Prudence Columns “My Twin Sister Says I’m Fat: Prudie offers advice on twins entangled in family rifts, rows, and rivalries.” Posted Aug. 25, 2011. More Dear Prudence Chat Transcripts “Type ‘R’ for Revenge: Dear Prudence advises a woman who got her cheating ex …

Dear Prudence: My mother has ruined my credit by stealing my identity.
12 years, 6 months ago

Dear Prudence: My mother has ruined my credit by stealing my identity.

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? More Dear Prudence Columns “Past Imperfect: I want to bury my wretched childhood, but the new in-laws insist on a rehash.” Posted Aug. 18, 2011. More Dear Prudence Chat Transcripts “The Nudist Next Door: Dear Prudence advises a reader whose new neighbor needs better curtains—during …

Dear Prudence: My creepy brother-in-law peeps on me.
12 years, 6 months ago

Dear Prudence: My creepy brother-in-law peeps on me.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat live with readers. You cannot wait until you are actually crying out, “No, Norman, no!” Sit your husband down and say it’s possible that since he’s a man, he doesn’t understand how utterly violated and vulnerable a woman would feel by his brother’s behavior. A: Forget other people and …

Dear Prudie: My husband invited a homeless woman to live with us. Should I leave him?
12 years, 6 months ago

Dear Prudie: My husband invited a homeless woman to live with us. Should I leave him?

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? —Arf Ouch Dear Arf, When a dog is 16 years old and a veterinarian announces she’s on “borrowed time” it doesn’t make sense to borrow money for medical bills. More Dear Prudence Chat Transcripts “The Nudist Next Door: Dear Prudence advises a reader whose new …

Dear Prudie: My parents play such favorites, my younger sister is depressed and has eating disorders.
12 years, 6 months ago

Dear Prudie: My parents play such favorites, my younger sister is depressed and has eating disorders.

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? “Take My Wife, Please: I convinced her to bed another man, and now I’m insanely jealous.” Posted Aug. 4, 2011. More Dear Prudence Chat Transcripts “The Nudist Next Door: Dear Prudence advises a reader whose new neighbor needs better curtains—during a live chat at Washingtonpost.com.” …

Dear Prudie: My husband monitors me through my laptop.
12 years, 8 months ago

Dear Prudie: My husband monitors me through my laptop.

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? It’s fine if you put a note in the invitation envelope saying something like, “Due to medical sensitivity within the wedding party, please refrain from wearing perfume.” But that’s hardly going to solve the problem. : A woman involved in the mysterious disappearance of a …

Dear Prudie: My boss pantsed someone at work. Should I tattle?
12 years, 8 months ago

Dear Prudie: My boss pantsed someone at work. Should I tattle?

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? : A woman involved in the mysterious disappearance of a feline doesn’t know whether to cover up or confess.” Posted July 21, 2011. More Dear Prudence Chat Transcripts “Confronting the Queen Bees: Dear Prudence advises a teen who longs to stand up to her cruel …

Sick spouse: Is it OK to take a lover if your husband can’t meet your needs?
13 years, 2 months ago

Sick spouse: Is it OK to take a lover if your husband can’t meet your needs?

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? “The Mother Lode: Dear Prudence offers Mother’s Day advice regarding a swearing granny, a distant daughter, and a combative wife.” Posted May 5, 2011. “Pregnant Widow: Dear Prudence advises a woman who discovered she’s pregnant after the sudden death of her husband—during a live chat …

Make out queen: My bridesmaid girlfriend hooked up with three groomsmen.
13 years, 2 months ago

Make out queen: My bridesmaid girlfriend hooked up with three groomsmen.

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? —Prudie Dear Prudence, A couple of weeks ago, as a prank my husband put ketchup, mustard, and hot sauce in his co-worker “Frank’s” tea. “The Mother Lode: Dear Prudence offers Mother’s Day advice regarding a swearing granny, a distant daughter, and a combative wife.” Posted …

Dear Prudence: My abusive mother haunts my dreams.
13 years, 5 months ago

Dear Prudence: My abusive mother haunts my dreams.

Slate  

Dear Prudence, My mother was violent, scary, and abusive. —Prudie Dear Prudence: Fallen for My Ex’s Sister Dear Prudence, Five years ago I went from working for myself to working for a Fortune 500 company. “I’ll Have What the Toddler’s Having: Dear Prudence advises a woman whose partner eats only unsophisticated kids’ food.” Posted April 14, 2011. “Baby on Board: …

Dear Prudence: Huntington's disease is tearing my family apart.
13 years, 6 months ago

Dear Prudence: Huntington's disease is tearing my family apart.

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? ”I’ll Have What the Toddler’s Having: Dear Prudence advises a woman whose partner eats only unsophisticated kids’ food.” Posted April 14, 2011. ”Baby on Board: Dear Prudence advises a mom weary of rude subway riders interfering with her baby’s commute—in a live chat at Washingtonpost.com.” …

Dear Prudence: Must I tell my wife I'm bi-sexual?
13 years, 6 months ago

Dear Prudence: Must I tell my wife I'm bi-sexual?

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? —Prudie Dear Prudence, Last week, my wife and I got in an argument as we were driving to a friend’s house for a dinner engagement. ”I’ll Have What the Toddler’s Having: Dear Prudence advises a woman whose partner eats only unsophisticated kids’ food.” Posted April …

Dear Prudence: How do we handle our nude neighbor?
13 years, 6 months ago

Dear Prudence: How do we handle our nude neighbor?

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat live with readers. When you say you don’t tip if you don’t “use” the room, I assume you sleep in it and shower, thus requiring the maid to clean it and make it up. If she is just a nasty, vindictive person, one way these people gain power is …

Dear Prudence: My father-in-law might be a pedophile.
13 years, 6 months ago

Dear Prudence: My father-in-law might be a pedophile.

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? My husband doesn’t like his father but humors him so that he doesn’t “have to deal with him.” —Conflicted Mother Dear Conflicted, Sure, people can change. Ultimately, though, it sounds as if you’re going to have to join that burgeoning group of women who tell …

Dear Prudence: My twin hates me.
13 years, 7 months ago

Dear Prudence: My twin hates me.

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? ”I’ll Have What the Toddler’s Having: Dear Prudence advises a woman whose partner eats only unsophisticated kids’ food.” Posted April 14, 2011. ”Baby on Board: Dear Prudence advises a mom weary of rude subway riders interfering with her baby’s commute—in a live chat at Washingtonpost.com.” …

Dear Prudence: My in-laws want to know all about my wretched childhood.
13 years, 7 months ago

Dear Prudence: My in-laws want to know all about my wretched childhood.

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Chat alert: Prudie is on vacation. ”I’ll Have What the Toddler’s Having: Dear Prudence advises a woman whose partner eats only unsophisticated kids’ food.” Posted April 14, 2011. More Dear Prudence Chat Transcripts “My In-Laws Should Be Outlawed: Dear Prudence offers advice on overly critical, criminal-minded, and cringe-worthy in-laws during a …

Dear Prudence chat: I regret adopting my baby.
13 years, 7 months ago

Dear Prudence chat: I regret adopting my baby.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat live with readers. Because faster than you know it, this squalling infant will be toddling around saying, “Mama!” and you will laugh to read how you thought you’d never sleep through the night again. They’ve been together four long months and swear they’re “in love.” I am not too …

Dear Prudence: I'm dating a potential pervert.
13 years, 7 months ago

Dear Prudence: I'm dating a potential pervert.

Slate  

Get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week; Got a burning question for Prudie? —Prudie Dear Prudence, I’m finishing graduate school next year, and last semester I worked part time in a bookstore with an incredible team of people. ”I Can’t Relate: My estranged half-sister wants to get to know me, but I’m afraid my parents won’t approve.” Posted …

Dear Prudence: My girlfriend's nose job left her disfigured.
13 years, 8 months ago

Dear Prudence: My girlfriend's nose job left her disfigured.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat with readers about their romantic, family, financial, and workplace problems. I would rather have the basics from my registry first, then slowly accumulate the “goodies” from my friends’ businesses. Maybe at the next big family gathering make an announcement that while you loved it when your baby nephew called …

Dear Prudence chats live with readers at Washingtonpost.com.
13 years, 8 months ago

Dear Prudence chats live with readers at Washingtonpost.com.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat with readers. When someday you’re clearing everything out for the move to the retirement community, how nice it will be to find these again and think, “Irrefutable evidence that I was hot!” Q. A: Half the responses say I was too nice to “this entitled ninny” and half, like …

Dear Prudence advises a woman who is reluctant to wed her dim-bulb suitor.
13 years, 8 months ago

Dear Prudence advises a woman who is reluctant to wed her dim-bulb suitor.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat with readers about their romantic, family, financial, and workplace problems. Although many readers recommend bringing lawsuits for infractions like the company cafeteria using too much mayonnaise, in this case, if you can’t get relief from a boss who is simultaneously trying to ruin your reputation and get you into …

Cat fanciers, fat boyfriends, violent video games, and risqué wardrobes: Prudie chats live with readers at Washingtonpost.com.
13 years, 10 months ago

Cat fanciers, fat boyfriends, violent video games, and risqué wardrobes: Prudie chats live with readers at Washingtonpost.com.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat with readers about their romantic, family, financial, and workplace problems. It’s another to be excluded from the end of your mother’s life so she could have more quality time with the cat. It’s too late, now, of course, but it would have been best if you and your sister …

Judgmental in-laws, nosy co-workers, noisy neighbors, and absentee parents—Dear Prudence chats live with readers at Washingtonpost.com.
13 years, 11 months ago

Judgmental in-laws, nosy co-workers, noisy neighbors, and absentee parents—Dear Prudence chats live with readers at Washingtonpost.com.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat with readers about their romantic, family, financial, and workplace problems. Something like: “We’re happy that you’re having so much fun in bed, but please respect that your early morning passion is ruining the time in bed for those of us who are just sleeping. Re: Noisy Neighbor: But if, …

Marriage jitters, ugly boyfriend, forgetful co-worker, and fake letters—Dear Prudence chats live with readers at Washingtonpost.com.
13 years, 11 months ago

Marriage jitters, ugly boyfriend, forgetful co-worker, and fake letters—Dear Prudence chats live with readers at Washingtonpost.com.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat with readers about their romantic, family, financial, and workplace problems. I don’t want to lose him as a friend, but I would want to know if any ex of mine had access to my Facebook or email account. There are gift people, then there are “Oh my God, it’s …

Baby shower rivalry, dog adoption regret, suspected domestic abuse—Dear Prudence chats live with readers at Washingtonpost.com.
14 years ago

Baby shower rivalry, dog adoption regret, suspected domestic abuse—Dear Prudence chats live with readers at Washingtonpost.com.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat with readers about their romantic, family, financial, and workplace problems. You and your husband are already having tantrums, refusing to share, and stomping your feet and screaming, “Me, me, me!” Your brother may be an attention-hogging jerk, but you’re a petty, attention-hogging jerk yourself. I bet in six months …

Dear Prudence chats live with readers at Washingtonpost.com.
14 years, 4 months ago

Dear Prudence chats live with readers at Washingtonpost.com.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat with readers about their romantic, family, financial, and workplace problems. It’s one thing to tell your son or daughter-in-law they can call you “Mom” or “Dad.” It’s another thing to insist. I say some people probably think it’s unsanitary to have reading material in the bathroom or guests just …

Dear Prudence answers readers' questions live at Washingtonpost.com.
15 years, 1 month ago

Dear Prudence answers readers' questions live at Washingtonpost.com.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com weekly to chat with readers about their romantic, family, financial, and workplace problems. Emily Yoffe: I am not defending porn, but as a society I believe we have gone too far in the direction of ruining people’s lives because of their viewing habits. As far as I know, there aren’t any legal …

Dear Prudence answers readers' questions live at Washingtonpost.com.
15 years, 7 months ago

Dear Prudence answers readers' questions live at Washingtonpost.com.

Slate  

Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washingtonpost.com every Monday at 1 p.m. to chat with readers about their romantic, family, financial, and workplace problems. Emily Yoffe: I wish you had explained why it’s taken 22 years for your son to meet your brother. Emily Yoffe: You say that she has all the qualities you are looking for in a …

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