Making way for mindfulness

A 24-year male client in therapy tells me, “The pandemic has been a time where I have ended up spending lots of time alone and missed being in an intimate relationship. I wonder what I can do to make my relationships work and understand what presence really means.” As we worked in therapy, we recognised that mindfulness about one’s own feelings, and towards one’s partner, is a good point to start. In simple words, mindfulness can be understood as our ability and capacity to be present and attentive in the present moment to what’s happening within us. It’s in those little moments I fall in love with him all over again.” Mindfulness requires a fundamental shift where we consciously transition from doing to being mode. As author Justin Bariso says, “Pausing helps you refrain from making a permanent decision based on a temporary emotion.” This ability to step back and stay with one’s own discomfort can go a long way in resolving conflict and building mindful communication.