How OCD can destroy relationships: ‘I had the obsessive fear that I might cheat’

Zachary James remembers the exact moment that his first intrusive thought lodged itself in his mind. You try and put your mind at rest, but you can’t Shaun Flores The condition damaged James’s self-esteem, making him feel like “unlovable” or “unable to love”. You try and put your mind at rest, but you can’t.” open image in gallery People with OCD experience intensely negative, repetitive and intrusive thoughts, combined with a chronic feeling of doubt or danger The thoughts prevented him from forming stable attachments as he would split up with partners after a few weeks. Wallbank adds: “As a partner, taking time to learn about OCD and what drives the OCD cycle can be helpful.” Charity worker Mairéad Ruane’s own struggles with relationship OCD had their roots in her teens and twenties, years that were marred by anxiety caused by obsessive thoughts and compulsions. When Ruane searched online for “Why are my thoughts telling me I’m a bad person”, she discovered a definition for Pure-O, a type of OCD with no external signs of compulsions and she was eventually diagnosed four years ago.