Alphabet Is the Worst Name the New Google Could Have Called Itself
In a surprise Monday statement, Google announced it will subordinate itself to a newly created parent company named Alphabet, whose holdings will include former Google departments like its experimental research and fiber optics arms. Compare the plodding, striving, uncool Alphabet with its subsidiary, the Dadaist Google, which as the story goes is a bastardization of Googol, itself a word invented by a child. Alphabet is the one stacking blocks in the middle of the room shouting, “Look at me!” That’s why Google’s transubstantiation into Alphabet is a bully move, made more so because of the company’s size and importance. The new Alphabet is already replacing the old alphabet, and yet another word—a very important word—that was once in the common purview recedes further into the distance.
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