RICHARD LITTLEJOHN: The BBC is accused of refusing to air a charity song criticising the PM. So here's another Starmer-inspired bid for Christmas No1 that won't get played either...

The BBC is coming under pressure to play a spoof song criticising Keir Starmer for stripping pensioners of their winter fuel allowances. On the fourth day of Christmas Keir Starmer took for free Four Calvin Kleins Three pairs of glasses Two pairs of trainers A frock for the missus And a new suit from Lord Alli. On the eighth day of Christmas Keir Starmer took for free Eight designer tee-shirts Proms tickets from the BBC A few weeks in Soho Courtesy of Lord Alli Good old Waheed! Four Calvin Kleins Three pairs of glasses A couple of Nike trainers A frock for the missus Four grand’s worth of Taylor Swift tickets And a couple for Rachel Reeves. Two tickets for Highbury Four Calvin Kleins Three grand for glasses Fifteen for ‘work clothes’ Multiple pairs of glasses A couple of Nike trainers A personal shopper for the missus Four grand’s worth of Taylor Swift tickets A couple for Rachel Reeves And another suit from Lord Alli!