‘In a total panic that they were going to bin my future children, I had to get the sperm out of Alicante’

Sign up to our free Living Well email for advice on living a happier, healthier and longer life Live your life healthier and happier with our free weekly Living Well newsletter Live your life healthier and happier with our free weekly Living Well newsletter SIGN UP I would like to be emailed about offers, events and updates from The Independent. I don’t think his mum really believed it was going to happen – even though she is a doting grandmother these days. Given the situation could go on for years, some genius lab person came up with the idea that we wouldn't need to use a whole sample during an IVF round and could get the mini icepick out to chisel away at my potential future, taking little bits at a time. It turned out that Russia was the cheapest place and I had always wanted to go to St Petersburg anyway – America was just too far away Meanwhile, it turned out that some unlicensed fertility supplements I was on from America – which supposedly improved egg quality, and called the fountain of youth – were raising my progesterone levels through the roof. In a total panic that they were going to bin my future children, I called around different clinics in the US, Cyprus – even Croatia – to find them a safe haven.