I've been arguing with my partner about our cat and I'm so exasperated I want to explode. "Secure attachment means that you've learnt from your experience that turning to others is a good idea, it makes you feel better, it helps you regulate your inner world," she says. "We're built to seek closeness and want it, but at the same …
A friend calls you out on a bad-taste joke. "If you feel compelled to act, that's a sure-fire sign that you are in defensive mode, so even more reason to pull the pin and check in with yourself," says Melbourne-based clinical psychologist Jacqueline Baulch. If the other person is making their point in a particularly aggressive way or contemptuous way, …