I feared I would die in my sleep despite only being in my 20s: SARFRAZ MANZOOR reveals how the sudden death of his father left him obsessed that he'd go to bed and never wake up

For a long time now I have had trouble sleeping whenever my wife and children are away. Once they've left I can pass the day reasonably well, but I know the trouble lies ahead, when it is time to sleep. 'My body was so sleep-deprived, by the time the family came home to me from trips I would be a physical wreck' Why am I like this? I would be terrified of slipping into sleep because I feared I might never wake up. I found podcasts about the most arcane subjects to bore me to sleep, such as '1925 Transatlantic eastbound passenger sailings' and '1912 Ford Motor Cars Model T instruction manual, part one', but sadly the more arcane the subject the more fascinating I found them.